Hot and Cold Food

First of all, I’d like to point out that this thought came to me while I was browsing thru all my other thoughts that I’ve written down. I wasn’t actually reading my other thoughts, I just had the word document open and I was scrolling through it… I found it a little ironic. Anyway, here’s what I was thinking: my mouth gets really messed up when I have some food that is both spicy and cold. Especially when it’s a little colder than it needs to be. Then it’s like, oh this is kinda cold (because almost nothing spicy is spicy immediately when it enters your mouth) then all of the sudden BOOM your mouth is on fire, but since the food is cold it’s still crazy because you remember how cold your mouth is, but it’s still hot because it’s spicy. It’s kinda like sauna swim (you get hot in a sauna, then go into some cold water… crazy!). Sometimes I just need to be messed up.

Big Mac for Scottie Mac

The Big Mac. First I would like to point out the presentation of the big mac. It comes in its own personalized box which shows the ingredients that come on the big mac. The box also advertizes how unique the big mac is. The caption on the box says, “What makes your Big Mac so unique? Maybe it’s how the double layer of sear-sizzled 100% pure beef mingles with the sauce and melty cheese, the snap of onion and the tart crunch of pickle. Or, maybe it’s just that it’s tall.” After I read this, I was expecting a gourmet delight of a hamburger. Or at least something that was crunchy and snapped. I found neither of these to be true. Truth be told I was pretty excited for my first bite. I couldn’t wait to experience the sounds that went along with the sights, smells, tastes, and feelings that went along with the big mac, but I was greeted with no such pleasures and that was only the first disappointment.

The big mac also advertised about being “tall” and I found this to be a bit questionable. I have definitely seen taller burgers in my life, and in fact, I think I’ve even seen burgers that are taller than the box the big mac comes in. Especially since the big mac is a double decker burger with three buns, I definitely thought it could have been bigger (that’s what she said). All in all, I would say that the size didn’t matter as long as the taste was good (this sounds so wrong… burgers people, burgers) but it didn’t taste all that good and one of the selling points was the size, which also didn’t impress.

Another main selling point of the big mac was its uniqueness. After reading the box, I got the impression that not only was the big mac as a burger unique, but each individual big mac was unique. For starters, they tell you all the ingredients of the big mac on the outside of the box and even though there is a “secret sauce” I have it on good knowledge (my father, Charles) that it isn’t a secret at all. Even if it was a secret, McDonald’s doesn’t seem to be any good at keeping it a secret, they’ll sell the burger to anybody. This is in high contrast to the krabby patty, which Mr. Krabs and Spongebob would guard with their lives, and I have seen no such heroism from the McDonald’s employees. Back to the point though, while the big mac itself could easily be duplicated, I also get the distinct impression that each burger is almost machine made. I don’t really have any proof other than the fact that in the past I have had one or two big macs and they’ve all been exactly the same. In other words, all big macs are basically the exact same thing. Again, I wouldn’t care if it wasn’t unique if it tasted good.

Up until now, everything about the big mac has been a lie. Unfortunately, I am unable to tell you about the cheese because I didn’t want to dissect the burger in order to preserve the integrity of it. However, looking back in my past dealings with McDonalds, I can say one thing for the big mac: in comparison to all other McDonalds food products (excluding fries), everything the big mac says, is true. For example, it is fairly tall compared to a bacon cheeseburger. All in all, I would say the big mac needs some big work. It isn’t one of my favorite foods and I wouldn’t even pick it if my only options were fast food options. It seems to me that the big mac is a good fit for somebody with an extremely low food budget where a four dollar meal would be a real treat (i.e. hicks).